I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
