we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
