my mouth tastes like poor choices
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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