I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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