Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
NoShamevember. You game?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Randomize
