I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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