We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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