First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Randomize
