i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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