I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize