It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
