Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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