It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You did what with his pubic hair?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
