I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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