trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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