I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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