you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
