It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
