All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
