dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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