You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
