We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
