Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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