she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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