i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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