I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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