i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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