dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
