whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
