He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
