Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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