oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
