Joe is yelling at the trees again.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
