I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
