The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
