dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
