oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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