Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
