Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
