If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
