so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
