it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize