marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
