he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
