Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
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