On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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