Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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