I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
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