Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
