Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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